Working Meditation

Observations on Human Connection & Contribution

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Archives for March 2021

#9: You are the 4-minute mile

Roger Bannister was the first human to run a four-minute mile. Athletes had been chasing this goal for decades until that point, and have accomplished it almost 1,500 times since. When you see a person break barriers, it changes something inside. A small part of you starts unfurling to embrace more ease and less fear. Even more so if it’s someone you can identify with, or they had to overcome similar or greater odds. Their achievement gives you faith and confidence in yourself, which is a precursor to dreaming and then resourcing yourself to action those dreams.

A friend’s courage in having her child against odds made the idea of family accessible to me. 77-year-old Nancy Pelosi’s eight-hour speech (in four-inch heels) on a topic she was passionate about gave a new face to how I think of stamina and aging. That Mother Teresa could make a significant difference in the world while privately facing spiritual doubt gave faith a more nuanced color. All these people are quite different from me, but there is a part of their story that some part of me was hoping could be true. When I saw their stories, I quietly added a patch to my personal tapestry of vision and motivation. There are countless people who helped me through their example in ways they will never know. This is what people mean when they say stories matter. We need all types of examples and all types of stories. Maybe one day that spark I need comes from an elderly white man who faced unexpected and excruciating personal loss, repeatedly, and still rose up (Joe Biden) or a conservative Mormon who had the courage to go against the grain (Mitt Romney). My point here isn’t political; these people happened to be top of mind on the day I made this observation.

The point is that each of us living fully in a way that is truly and uniquely us, allows us to be that 4-minute mile for another human. We just pass along the motivation, faith, and courage that has been passed on to us. And it’s ok if we never know whom we impacted.

“That we can make a house called tomorrow.
What we bring, finally, into the new day, every day,

Is ourselves.  And that’s all we need
To start.  That’s everything we require to keep going.

Look back only for as long as you must,
Then go forward into the history you will make.

Be good, then better.  Write books.  Cure disease.
Make us proud.  Make yourself proud.

And those who came before you?  When you hear thunder,
Hear it as their applause.”
— Alberto Ríos

#8: Gratitude for wonky blessings

I saw a friend’s life change in significant ways in the course of two years. She found a wonderful partner, and a dream home with a spectacular view that many might envy. Excited for her, I reflected gleefully on this abundance of delights and uncovered a “but”. She had given up a much cherished neighborhood, hard earned roots, and a community she loved enough to commute over long distances; so she could rest her head in the place she adored.  This “but” is embedded in our lives. We often get what we hope for, in big and small ways, but the wish doesn’t come to life in exact specs. I made a silent vow to notice and absorb my imperfect blessings as they come my way. I didn’t have to wait long at all.

Two days after seeing my friend, I sat down to take care of hospitalization bills that were weighing me down. When these bills started pouring in initially, they were jarring to say the least. Thousands of dollars that were crushing my already tender body. I had a new and untested health insurance and said aloud to my husband “wouldn’t it be great if insurance just made these bills vanish!”.  It took months of back and forth with the insurance company, the hospital and several administrators to figure out the details. So finally, the day came for me to pay my bills and reconcile everything. Buried under the burden of itemization across many different portals, I found my mind spinning and spirit sagging – “If I don’t get through this minutiae quickly, how can I move forward with the life and work I want to create?”. As the palpitations and stress arose, I called upon my newfound yogic breathing techniques and acknowledged the wave of emotion as it crashed against my chest. Then I fanned the tiny flame of resilience, restarted the review and in a few minutes chanced upon this – 

Claim Claim Number Type Medical Provider MEDICAL Status paid SUPARNA CHHIBBER Billed Amount $15,182.64 You May so. oo

Sure, this was just one line item of the many but in one fell swoop, my wish had come true and rather than pausing in thankfulness, my heart was palpitating in the angst of lost productivity.

“May I have the wisdom to know when good things are happening, as they are happening” – says Suparna to Tim, often

#7: Everything was once an idea

Omitting nature, everything that surrounds us right now was once a kernel of an idea in somebody’s mind. The chair I sit on, the industrial-style bookshelf designed to fit in a tight space while looking airy, the “happy light” that blasts full spectrum light into my retina to energize me on overcast Seattle days, my height adjustable desk, the interesting brass frame from India, my favorite tea blend, that lovely piece of pottery holding the tea, my ergonomic keyboard, the book I’m reading, the bracelet I’m wearing, the lush green hedge I feast my eyes on while working. You get the point. Literally every artefact around me (and you) was once taking shape inside the mind of a creator, who sometimes doubted their ability to create. They brought these to life with their vision, effort and everyday acts of resilience.

When did we absorb messages telling us that we needed that special trait that will finally allow us to become a creator? Why does creation and creativity need to come in a certain body, clothed a particular way, wielding narrow technical acumen, and a vernacular to match? The creations around us could have germinated in a carpenter, a stay-at-home parent, a tech geek, or a horticulturalist. Examples are all around us.

What you seek is seeking you – Rumi

#6: What function might a human have?

“Where a muscle is located and what joints it crosses determines the function that the muscle will have” – Chiara Guerrieri, my yoga anatomy teacher

My biggest takeaway from Chiara’s anatomy teachings is that the human body is an astounding example of a well-run system. The opening sentence above is just one of the many practical reflections from Chiara. Even after several weeks, I continue to turn this straightforward yet complex sentence in my head for insights. While doing so, I replace the word “muscle” for the word “person”.

Where a person is located: in time, geography, culture, norms, identity, opportunity, access, skills, restrictions

And the joints they cross: exposure, experiences, intersections, knowledge, interests

Will determine the function they will have: their what and how

In other words, our geography often determines our biography. It is sometimes hard for me to zoom out and see my own geography and when I do, it is hard to view it with compassion. I didn’t get to choose a big chunk of my geography but I have the power to change some of it. Thinking this way also allows me to objectively understand why others may think and act in fiercely contrasting ways. The permutations are endless!

“Break through the wall!
Find my dream!
Help me to shatter this darkness,
To smash this night,
To break this shadow
Into a thousand lights of sun,
Into a thousand whirling dreams
Of sun!”
– Langston Hughes

#5: The Dennis Rodman within

I watched The Last Dance, the Michael Jordan and Chicago Bulls documentary, on Netflix. One of the things that struck me was Dennis Rodman’s psychological makeup and his contrast to Jordan. Knowing Rodman’s history now, I can see the through line and understand what created the powerful need in him to escape into the wild and release pressure periodically. If it happened to be in ways that were optically unfavorable to him, he didn’t care. He needed to shut out the demands to perform so he could recapture a part of him.

Lately I’ve been noticing the Jordan and Rodman inside me. The striver, methodical planner, relentless doer, unquenchable attainer. The one who creates structure and pushes me to keep going. Then there is the independent and stubborn – almost Husky dog like creature – that feels claustrophobic after too many days of heavy structure. It wants to play without agenda. The type of play that doesn’t have a secret goal of coaxing out productivity. It doesn’t want endless sleep or Netflix, it craves exploration; random travel, conversations, art, play, laughter. When it doesn’t get what it needs, it becomes lackluster, glassy eyed, lethargic, and less of who it naturally is. I never let my Rodman-Husky play because the striving Jordan needed to build stability and it feared that the wild and independent one might venture too far from home and never come back to do the work. Probably for the first time in my life, I’m giving the Husky a chance and it’s sniffing the trails to uncover long buried gems. My life feels richer for it.

“Then you will see gardens with secluded rose bowers, and they will all be inside you.” – Rumi