Easier said than done. When you are alone, you know no one is watching and no one will ever critique your funky dance moves. No matter how free a dancer you are, a part of you gets tuned into the performance the minute you are surrounded by onlookers.
I’m noticing that before I started posting anything publicly, insights would gush out of me and I couldn’t download them fast enough. It didn’t matter what flavor these downloads were; I would tune in and put my intimate thoughts on paper without regard to outcome. There was no editing whatsoever as the words exploded onto the screen. A lot of this writing felt new, and at times unexpected, to me too. I didn’t know that I had those word combinations inside the crevices of my mind and it sometimes felt as if I was reading the material for the first time. This isn’t ancient history. This happened until a couple of weeks ago so I know nothing major has changed, except now a few dear family and friends know about the existence of this blog. I’m noticing that now the editing starts happening the minute I begin documenting an idea, even before I’ve allowed the complete download to happen. Because I know my words are now also consumed by others, there’s a part of me that feels the need to “create value”. Some common thought patterns I’m noticing – will this be useful in their context; am I coming out too strong, too preachy, or too political; is this writing too long or too short; am I wasting people’s time and…blah, blah, blah.
The need to be liked and loved is deep-seated in our human animal, and it shows up repeatedly in our everyday. Our more developed brain knows that no one is kicking us out of the tribe for a little dance move or a blog post but the reptilian brain keeps shooting flares. I can see this impact today in a very tangible way – I’m losing my purity of thought as the reptilian brain jumps in to edit my words before I’m ready. I know my reptile will shadow me till I live so here’s my solve: I refuse to stop the gushing stream of ideas at the source. I will edit more consciously later in the process to ensure others, that don’t live inside my head, understand my intended meaning.
Yes, I’ll make sure that the message makes sense to the audience, the product satisfies the customers, the strategy makes sense to the team, and the venture gets funded. But before I do any of that, I need to keep nurturing that pure flame of insight and not let my reptilian fear snuff it out.
We start editing too early in the process.
“FROM pent-up aching rivers,
From that of myself, without which I were nothing,
From what I am determin’d to make illustrious, even if I stand
sole among men…” ― Walt Whitman
